Questions to ask your new therapist in your first appointment or consultation
I met with a therapist yesterday, and the first thing she asked me was, "Do you have any questions?"
And yes, I did. Here are the ten questions I chose to ask her to help me understand if she was someone I wanted to start the therapeutic relationship with:
How often will we meet?
What does your practice specialize in?
What can I expect in our sessions?
How long have you been practicing?
How many sessions do your clients see you for on average?
Who did you vote for in the last election?
Do you have other Black female clients?
Have you been working with them for a while?
Do you believe that we live in a culture that is centered in white supremacy?
What are your thoughts on white privilege?
Listen...that last half of the list...I needed to know.
Yesterday, the therapist felt like a good fit for my needs. If not, I would have scheduled a free consultation or first appointment with another therapist. You might need to date a few therapists before you find the right fit. Don't feel like you're stuck with someone that you don't want to work with.
Below is an extensive list of questions that I've gathered from industry experts. You can pick and choose from the list to find the right set of questions for you.
Questions to ask during your first therapy session or consultation
Learn the therapist's process:
How often are we meeting?
How long will therapy last?
What is a typical session like? How long are the sessions?
What resources are available outside of therapy?
What is the patient confidentiality policy?
What kind of therapy does your therapist practice?
How is the office run?
If you're doing family or couples therapy, are you going to be in sessions alone or always with your family? How will that work?
What will progress look like?
How much do you charge? What are your sliding-scale options?
Could you tell me about your clinic policies related to insurance, cancellations, and no-shows?
Learn about the qualifications of the therapist and their practice
How long have you been practicing?
Do you have a license to provide treatment for mental health concerns?
What licenses and certifications do you have and which professional organizations do you belong to?
How many clients have you had with similar circumstances to my own? When was the last time you worked with someone similar to me?
Describe your ideal patient.
What are your strengths and limitations as a counselor?
What is your general philosophy and approach to helping? Are you more directive or more guiding?
Have you been in therapy yourself? How recently?
How often do you seek peer consultation?
How do you set up counseling goals? What are they like? What is success for you?
What is a typical session like? How long are the sessions?
What kind of homework/reading do you give patients?
How do I prepare for my first session?
Learn about how they want to work with you
My problem is _______. How would you go about treating that?
Have you worked with individuals that are experiencing similar concerns?
How do you think therapy can help me?
Do you think I should consider medication?
Can you prescribe medication or refer me to a doctor that can?
How will I know if therapy is working?
How many sessions do you anticipate it will take to see noticeable improvement?
Some therapists are more comfortable addressing the immediate problem, while others want to focus on the deeper issue. Which are you?
Do you tend to lead the session, or follow my lead?
What role does our relationship play in our work?
Learn about their experience with your personal identification. (I got these questions from a great post which has a lot of questions to help you work with a therapist you don't identify with. Check it out here.)
Have you worked with a person of color before
What makes you qualified to work with a person of color?
What have you done to learn about my specific culture?
How are you continuing to learn about my culture?
As a person of color, why should I trust you?
Do you believe that we live in a white supremacy culture?
Do you operate from a racial justice framework? How did you learn about that framework?
What are your thoughts on white privilege?
How do you experience and handle your own white fragility?
Do you believe that racism exists?
Would you feel uncomfortable if I talked about how white people have been racist to me?
How would you feel if I talked about how much I can’t stand white people sometimes? Would you be offended?
Do you have supervisors or therapists of color that you consult with?
Do you speak any other languages?
Questions to ask yourself after your first therapy session or consultation
How soon did you feel relaxed when speaking with the therapist?
Did you feel rushed to ask your questions, or were you able to go at your own pace?
Did the therapist seem to “get” your questions, or did they misinterpret or need to ask for several clarifications?
Did you feel like the conversation flowed, or was it clunky and awkward?
Did you understand the response, or was it filled with technical jargon or vague statements?
Imagine your deepest, darkest secret — could you imagine telling this person about it?
Do they challenge you?
Do they check-in with you?
Do they guide you to your goals?
Do they help you learn?
Do they show acceptance and compassion?
Do they treat you as an equal?
Yes, this is a long list. Pick and choose the questions that feel right for you. This will help you get a gauge on whether this new therapist is a good fit for you. And if they are not, there's no reason to stick around. Get on the calendar for consultations with a few different therapists. You'll find the right therapist eventually.
Reply to this email and let me know if you're gonna ask any of these questions, and feel free to share it with anyone else you think it might help.
If you plan on finding a therapist in February, it's time to start reaching out to them now - waitlists are long for appointments - we all need help!